Saturday, November 20, 2010

The Unfrosted Poptart of Celebrity Monkey Business


Gossip alert! This new news is newer than the new world on Thanksgiving Day. Incredible stories up ahead, with an emphasis on edible!

First Item- Actor Renee Zelwigger spent forty five minutes last Thursday attempting to recover a drivers license that slipped out of her purse and fell into a sewer grate. She waved a long twig with chewed gum on the end through the metal bars in order to snag the dropped card, but only picked up bottle caps and a the bottom half of a discarded love note. Inside sources say that she used cotton candy flavored Bubblelicious.

Item B- Actor Bobby Flay prepared a celebrity dinner out of the back room of barbecue restaurant "Geordie LaForge", the restaurant opened by and named after the actor that portrayed Geordi LaForge on televisions Star Quest.

Item 3- At a recent, impromptu Q+A session held in the waiting room of a Jiffy Lube, Actor Mark Pellegrino admitted that, as a third grader, he did not receive a valentine card from the girl on whom he had a big crush. Did this emotional rejection drive the Actor into the Acting business? We'll bring you the answer as this story develops....